Dating and Marriage

     Dating is the first step to forming a happy family. However, in the current world, the significance of dating has seemed to go down. I have observed that people my age don't really date anymore. Instead of dating, big groups of people get together and just 'hang-out'. Hanging out and dating might seem like vey similar things, but there are a few aspects of dating that make it different and very valuable for building relationships and future marriage. First, dating is planned out. When you ask someone on a date, you are typically expected to have a plan.

     I had a recent date where the guy who asked me out did not plan out the date. Just an hour before the date, he decided he wanted to teach me how to dance. I was skeptical. I knew that learning to dance would be fun, but if it fell through, we would have nothing else to do. This is exactly what happened. My date forgot the dance, and we just talked awkwardly for a few minutes before he left. Properly planning out an activity is a vital aspect of dating. 

    Another aspect of dating that differentiates it from hanging out is that dates are paid for. Dates are usually paid for by the person who has asked the other on a date. I have had a few dates where the guy who asked me out requested me to pay for half. This made me feel odd, as I had always paid for my date when I was the one to ask them out. Hanging out is closer to what my dates were trying to do: splitting price. When you hang out with friends, you tend to pay for just yourself, or split the price between everyone. No one pays for someone else. This may seem like such a trivial aspect of dating. But paying for your date shows them that you are willing to put in the work and resources for them. This is an important kind of trust and relationship to build for future marriage. 

    The last aspect of dating is pairing off. A date includes two people who are together for the activity. If there is a bigger group, it is divided into pairs. I had one experience where my sister and I were asked on a double-date to a movie theater. When we got there, my sisters date sat in the second seat of the four the boys had bought. My date reached our row, and sat in the first seat. This made it so the order of seating was my date, my sisters date, my sister, and me. I wasn't sitting by my date! It was just as if I had gone to the movies with my sister. Because my date had not sat by me, I felt left out and almost invisible. Pairing off on a date is an important difference from just hanging out because it ensures that everyone has another person with them and paying attention to them. 

    Dating is very important not only before marriage, but during it. My parents have always gone out on a date every week, and I thought that was the typical things. But when others my age would talk of their parents, they would say their parents were lucky to go out once every few months. My parents have a strong relationship, and I like to think that part of it is because of their weekly dates. Having frequent dates as a couple allows for time to be spent with just your partner, and helps you to have a time and space to communicate with just them. Spending time with your spouse is very important through your marriage.  

    Overall, it is vital that we understand the importance of dating before and after marriage. Dating helps young adults discover what type of person they would like to marry, and how they can change themselves and grow to prepare for marriage. Dating helps married couples communicate, and spend special time together. Take time to date, if you are married or not, and you will have a better future because of it.